Part 2 of Flight of True Love

Here's part 2 of "Flight of True Love" written by Maylinda Jane in the Military Extra Publication

Date: Fri, 05 Jan 2007 12:26:38 -0500
Hello to Everyone,

In the November publication of the Military Extra I told you a story of
Shelly and Lt. Kelly D. Hall. I will give you a brief reminder about
their story and then I will share the rest of Shelly and Kelly’s story with
you.

Shelly and Lt. Kelly Hall are two people that shared such a powerful
love full of devotion, admiration, support and strength. During Kelly’s
career as a soldier they experienced many transfers from one military base to
another, just as other military families do. They had their ups and
downs in various career challenges, but also those that come along with being
a military family. Despite the obstacles or challenges that they faced,
they did it together and made sure that whatever was to come, their love
would always be their guiding strength for one another.


Here are the final words that were shared with you in the November
commentary. Shelly had waited for Kelly to meet her at the dentist
office. He had a routine check out flight at 0700 that should not have taken
more than a couple of hours, but he never made it to their appointment.
Shelly, frustrated, went to the airbase, parked her car next to her husbands at
the flight line and asked two soldiers to watch her children while she went
inside to find Kelly.


Shelly walked up to the Flight Operations with a stern stride in her
step and approached a CW3 (Chief Warrant Officer) that was on the phone.
Before she could say a word, his hand was stiff, palm open in the air and
hushes her. The CW3 stated “Safety team to arrive...” and Shelly knew
immediately there had been a serious accident or crash. The man looked at her and
asked “Who are you?” she replied “I’m Mrs. Hall”, and she watched the color
drain from this man’s face in a brief but slow motion moment. Shelly looked
him in the eye and asked “Survivors or not?” Shelly called me and said she
was on her way to my office to tell me the rest of her story, I told her I
would be waiting downstairs. As I sat there waiting for her I thought about
our previous visit and the story that she had shared with me. This woman
and man had five beautiful children and a love that often exceeds most
people’s expectations of what they can possibly experience in a lifetime.



The door opens and she steps into my office. We exchange hugs and
smiles, we sit down and travel to the past where we left off, bringing you to
the present. Shelly again asked the CW3 “Survivors or not?” he replied “I
can’t answer that”. Shelly looked at him through cloudy eyes and said “You
pretty much did”. Shelly said that it felt like the room was spinning, she
began walking around the room in circles not being able to focus on anything.
She was pacing back and forth with no direction, panic setting in, feeling
lost and confused at what was happening. The CW3 immediately picked up the
phone and asked that the Chaplain come to his office, saying Lt. Kelly Hall’s
wife was here.



Shelly remembers seeing the dry erase board with the list of flights
that had been scheduled to fly that day. Kelly and Dan Hunter names were on
the board and their call sign was “Argus 24”, next to the call sign were
the words saying the plane went down at 0924. The officer in the room
hangs up the phone, turns to Shelly, and again she asks survivors or not. He
replied I can’t say, but she already knew. In the midst of the fear that
surrounded her she heard the faint words of the officer asking for the Chaplain.


Overwhelmed with the situation, Shelly’s pacing increases to a frantic
need to leave the room in hopes of escaping this unfolding nightmare. As
she walks toward the door she tells the officer “I have to leave”, he tells
her that he can’t let her leave and that the Chaplain is on his way.
Shelly’s breathing is speeding up. Almost as if trying to catch up with the
thoughts that are racing through her mind, and she tells the officer that she
has to get her children who are outside with two soldiers. He reassured her
that the children would be fine and that they would bring them to her. She
felt sick to her stomach and asked how to find the bathroom. So many
emotions are flooding her body that she feels like a caged animal and begins to
scream and cry, her body moving in sporadic movements with no control.
Finally, she collapses on her knees to the floor, and then without
knowing how she got there, she is sitting on the couch in the office.



Ten minutes later the Chaplain, Colonel’s wife, and the Commander’s
wife, all who had been looking for Shelly throughout the day, arrived. The
children unaware of what is going on are still with the soldiers in the
hanger, playing with one another completely innocent to the reality of
the life altering news they would soon hear. Shelly sat there full of
indescribable pain and yet numb of her own existence. She remembered
that for some reason at two o’clock that day she had a bad feeling come over
her that something was wrong, and now realizing that her inner feeling had
come true.


She is sitting with the Chaplain and the other officials that have come
to her aid and she remembers thinking “is this really happening? This
can’t be real, it just can’t be.” Her emotions are engulfing her with each tick
of the clock and then her dominating thoughts are “how I am going to tell
the children?” Shelly took a deep breath, focused on the people that
surrounded her in the room and knew what she had to do; the military wife that she
had always been was now pulling herself together to fulfill the line of
duty of being a military wife. Again, in hopes of all this being a bad dream,
Shelly said “This can’t be happening”, the Chaplain takes her hand and
says “its official, the plane went down on final approach into Wurtzburg and
the officials are at the crash site”. He also told Shelly that there was a
Catholic priest at the crash site giving Kelly his last rites and this
brought her some comfort in knowing this. Later Shelly asked the
officials if she could see her husband, and she was told not yet, unknowing that
she would never be able to see her Kelly again. She began to make the
phone calls that are every parent’s nightmare. She called Kelly’s parents
and her parents with the news that would forever change all their lives.


Shelly asked that her three older children that were 4, 5 and 6 years
old be brought in to her. As soon as they walked in and saw their mother
crying, they knew something terrible had happened. Embracing one another, the
family that now has lost a father and husband pulls together to begin a
healing process that would take a long time. For on this day, November
6, 1998, their lives were forever changed. Shelly and the children were
escorted back to their home and she stated that the support they
received from the unit was unbelievable, a blessing she will never forget.


Once they arrived at the house, Shelly tried to function in what used
to be the norm and was now unfamiliar territory. As she sat there in the
den, Tyler, the oldest, came up to her mother and asked, “What kind of
ground did daddy’s plane crash into?” Shelly, a little bewildered by this
question, told Tyler that the plane crashed in dirt, dirt that was surrounded by
an apple orchard. Tyler replied “Thank goodness it wasn’t concrete, the
dirt made a softer landing for daddy”. She hugged her daughter, and thought
how amazing that she was already beginning to process and deal with this
tragedy. The thought of Tyler’s dad landing in dirt amidst an apple
orchard would not be painful, which brought Tyler some peace of mind.


Shelly’s parents arrived in Germany on November 8th, two day’s after
Kelly’s accident. Mr. Charles Hacker, Shelly’s dad, was previously a member of
the 82nd Airborne, C/Company 1/504th, the same unit that Kelly served in
while he was in the Gulf War. There was exactly thirty years difference in
their careers. Mr. Hacker saw Kelly as a son rather than a son-in-law, and
sharing the love of flying and being pilots only strengthened their
bond and deepened Mr. Hacker’s grief. He went to the crash site on the 9th and
the plane was still there. He respectfully paid his respects to his
son-in-law, Lt. Kelly D. Hall, and to CW3 Dan Hunter, two young men serving their
country with heart and soul. Shelly, needing to feel close to Kelly,
visited the crash site on the 11th. The plane had been removed and all
that was left was a huge hole in the earth which was symbolic to the hole in
her life. The smell of fuel still floating in the air, a muddy frame of
earth from where the plane had crashed and a farmers practically burned shed.
This tragic ending of two lives in the middle of an apple orchard in
the small German town of Sommerhausen would change everyone in some aspect
forever.


Shelly asked me if I had ever been to a military funeral or memorial.
I told her my dad’s, but that I was young and that I don’t remember
anything about it. She said that it is a military tradition to do Roll Call,
which is the calling of a soldiers name in the unit. They first call a
soldier by name who responds with “Here Sir!” another soldiers name is called and
he too responds with the same “Here Sir! Then they call Lt. Kelly Hall,
no response only silence, and then a second call for Lt. Kelly Hall, still
no answer. After the third request for an answer from Lt. Kelly D. Hall
meets with no response, Taps begins playing in honor of the fallen soldier,
father and husband. This was one of the most difficult moments for Shelly to
bear.


Shelly, now a widow with five children, knew that it was up to her to
keep things in order and try to pull her family together. That she had to
be the strong person that her Kelly had loved and admired for all the years
they had shared. Within six days of Kelly’s death, Shelly had planned a
memorial, went through the process of executing the will, cleared post,
packed, and headed back to the states to try and pick up the pieces of
her and her children’s shattered lives.


Shelly experienced many phases of grief which is part of the process
when you lose someone you love. There would be many moments of bewilderness
and feelings of being lost. Not knowing how to simply move forward without
the person that had walked with you on the path of life. Shelly shared
with me a story that happened two weeks after Kelly died. At 2am Shelly went
into her 11 month old son Tanner’s room to check on him and give him a
bottle.


As she walked into his room Tanner was saying “dada, dada” over and
over again and smiling. Shelly bent down to pick him up from his crib and
Tanner shook his head no and repeated those precious words “dada, dada”,
indicating who he wanted to pick him up. Shelly said that for the next ten days
around 2am Tanner would wake up and excitedly repeat the words “dada.”
She remembers another time when she had Tanner on her hip and he was
bouncing up and down giggling and saying “dada, dada.” Shelly said the hair on her
neck stood straight up, she wanted so badly to turn around, but just
couldn’t bring herself to do it. She hugged Tanner and slowly walked out of the
room feeling a peace surround her knowing that Kelly was in the room, and he
was telling Tanner goodbye.


Shelly knew she had to be strong for her children and for her own well
being as Kelly would have wanted her to be, and that Kelly would want her to
move forward with her life. When Shelly left Germany for the United States
she moved back home to Michigan, found a home for her and her family, and
day by day pulled the pieces of her life back together. Her older children
went to grief therapy, and Shelly, needing support, began searching for someone
who had experienced the same loss she was going through, someone to connect
with and help to guide her through this path of uncertainty.


After months of searching, Shelly discovered an organization that could
offer her something. She placed a call and within moments Bonnie
Carroll, the Founder of the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS),
contacted Shelly and shared with her the various ways that this program
would assist her and her children through this difficult time. TAPS
website (www.taps.org) lists benefits for military families, spouses and
children.


Shelly shared that this organization has a Good Grief Camp for children
who have lost a parent serving their country that is held every Memorial
Day Weekend in Washington DC and her children have attended this camp every
year since Kelly’s death. Each child is assigned a “Mentor/Soldier” of
their own who has attended training classes on how to help children cope with
grief.


There are also grief counselors who come from all around the world to
play with these children, assist with their grief, and to let them know they
have a friend to help them with their loss. For a lot of children, spending
time with these Mentors is their first exposure to a soldier since the loss
of their parent, which has a positive and profound effect on their lives.
Shelly has also become a Mentor in the TAPS program, wanting to give
back to others what she had received in her time of need. She is partnered
with widows that have some of the same circumstances she does, such as a
husband that was a pilot that died in a plane crash, or a parent raising their
children alone, or simply someone that lives in the same area. Shelly
also has volunteered with the Sheriff’s Department doing Death Notifications, and
is a part of a team referred to as “Access”, which is out of New York,
and assists family members that have lost a loved one in any sort of plane
crash, lending mentoring and support to the survivors.


Shelly stayed in Michigan for four years after the death of her
husband, and then moved to the Columbus and Fort Benning area wanting to be near a
large base, some place that really felt like home. She has such a deep love
for the military and the commitment of the soldiers and their families.
She is currently a full time student attending CSU for her Masters. She
stated that the children are doing great and are attending wonderful schools
that they love. She also stated that there are so many opportunities here
for her and her children that she has found some peace in living here.
This woman has experienced such a tragic loss, and in spite of everything
has moved forward with her life and gives so much back to so many others in
need. Shelly is also a board member for Crime Stoppers, a member of
the advisory board for the Regional Youth Detention Center, and a member of
the God Bless Fort Bennning Planning Committee.


I don’t know how I can ever tell her how much her sharing her story
with me has meant. Not only the words from her heart and soul, but also the
pictures, letters, and drawings that she and her children have shared
with me and now with you. She is an amazing woman, who is the definition of
a “Military Soldiers Wife and Mother”, serving her country, her
community, and her family in spite of her soldier now serving in God’s army in heaven.


Thank you Shelly for being who you are, and inspiring me to be more
aggressive in my involvement to this community as a United States
citizen and the daughter of a soldier who now serves with your Lt. Kelly D.
Hall in heaven above. If Shelly could say anything she would say: “Try not to
sweat the little things. Life is going to be cruel and difficult for
everyone at one time or another. That’s when it feels all out of
control.


The only thing I could really control was my attitude. I had a choice
to be angry at losing my soulmate or feeling blessed that we had 10 fabulous
years together and 5 beautifully healthy children. I chose the latter.”



By: Maylinda Jane